My Perfect Match

Lighting a candle successfully is an important skill that can easily be exercised with care to ensure safety. You can reduce the risks associated with lighting a candle by observing some basic precautions when lighting candles.

1

Obtain a box of safety matches. These matches are longer than ordinary matches and will reduce the risk of burning yourself.

Okay - as usual I may know what I am supposed to do but clearly have a problem with 'rules'. I am currently playing a great game of burn my fingers with a naked flame, in a poor attempt at lighting the candles in my home.  It doesn't matter how I hold the match, the flame is ALWAYS on a mission to inflict pain on me as it creeps up the wood faster than lightening toward my skin.

Candles are supposed to be relaxing.  Yeah right - I am super stressed and in agony at just lighting them.  I do have a fancy gas propelled, candle lighter but no, I make it my mission to have a daily battle with a naked flame.

I curse and swear under my breath and of course it is ALWAYS the fault of the 'match', never me.  However, on Saturday evening, a smug guy took pleasure in the thing that guys do so well, 'try and look better than us girls'.  I was subjected to the patronising, "see this is how you light a candle" spiel.  I wouldn't have minded but his candles were lit in seconds in a graceful display of finger control and minus the, 'ow - shit -' that happens when I attempt to light a candle.  Then, as only guys can, he proceeded to tell me that I needed 'safety matches' with long handles and I would have my 'perfect match'.

You see my idea of a 'perfect match' clearly aint his, mine is the guy meets girl kind.  My Mom (yes my poor Mom is mentioned again - for her great wisdom she imparts on me) always said, 'The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.'  There you go, that's why I use short matches, ('half'way to perfect)!  See this guy clearly doesnt know anything - to ignite the perfect 'flame' you need to meet 'half-way' and the shorter the distance, the nearer you are to the goal.

I guess in life my inner flame has recently died - well that is until I met some new friends, including 'flame' guy and an encounter with these people has rekindled my inner spirit.  So maybe that is the 'perfect match' - the person that can take my inner light and blow it into a flame and not the wooden spill type.  Hopefully there will be less chance of my uttering, 'ouch' and 'shit' with this ''perfect match'.  As for the candles, well maybe I'm after a different flame;)